Head

Today I read in The Onion about places in Milwaukee that are built on top of graveyards.

I met Garrett for dinner and told him about it, how an old newspaper report said school kids had found some skulls and were playing with them in the street. He said he had always wanted to own a skull.

I paused for moment, intrigued by his admission. Then, realizing I might be able to fulfill that desire, I offered him mine.

I asked him if he'd decorate my skull, or just have the bare bone show. Neither one of us had any particular design in mind, but we felt it was worthy of consideration.

We went on to debate the legalities of it and considered the logistics of it in a bit too much detail.

He figured if he put my head on an ant hill for a week or so with a bucket or something covering it up, it ought to be clean enough that he could then soak the bone in bleach so my skull would be stripped clean and ready for display.

He said he'd done the same with a trophy fish head once and it worked like a charm.

I didn't think he'd get away with letting the ants clean off my head, so we brainstormed until I felt I had to stop him when he suggested "it might work to make some kind of a stew."

A little while later there was singing and clapping in honor of someone who was celebrating their birthday. Garrett's birthday is in February, he commented that it's only a few months before his birthday too and asked me what he'd be getting.

I tried to counter by asking him what he wanted. He didn't answer, just smiled at me and asked again what he'd get.

"You'll get the same thing from me for your birthday as what you'll get from me when I die", I said, not missing a beat, not having to explain more. He knew exactly what I was getting at. Of course.

He'll get head.